What Do You Want To Change in 2023? Can Values Help?

Happy New Year (is it too late to say that? My motto is anytime in January ;))!

I always find the new year a good opportunity to reflect on the previous year and have a think about what I want the new year to be like. I don’t believe in resolutions as such as I think they bring a lot of pressure and short-term gain (with then usually feeling like you haven’t lived up to the unrealistic goals you’ve set yourself), however I do believe in reflecting on where I was this time last year, what I’ve enjoyed, found difficult and if I want there to be any developments or changes in this new year. During these reflections, thoughts often arise about how your life is right now, who you are as a person, how you treat others close to you and what you want to do/change in the new year.

Journaling is a great tool to help with these new year reflections, here are some journal prompts to help:

• What are your favourite memories from 2022? What about them makes them your favourite?
• What happened in 2022 that you feel sad about? Is there anything useful you can take from it?
• Are you content with who you are/how you treat yourself and others/what you do for a job or how you spend most of your time?
• Is your work/life/kids/family/friends balance the way you want it to be?
• Is there anything you want to change?

If you find some of these questions difficult, it may be useful to have a look at what your values are.

What are values and why are they so important?
Values are our truest beliefs and desires about who we aspire to be in this world, how we treat others and how we behave. They are our inner compass and direct, guide and motivate us in our decision making and the way we live our lives. Values essentially make us who we are. This is why it is so important to not just know our values but to live a fulfilling life to LIVE by these values – ensuring that the careers we choose, the relationships we have, the hobbies we make time for, the goals we set for ourselves all align to these values.

So, if you’re unsure about who you are, what you want, how you would like your life to be or find yourself a bit stuck or struggle with decision-making, a good place to start is exploring what your top ten values are and if your present aligns with them (being in touch with your intuition helps too but I will leave that for another post!).

There is no right or wrong in choice of values, just like one person prefers chocolate ice cream and another would rather have salted caramel, they are just different choices. If we all had the same values, life would be pretty uninteresting! Similarly, priorities of values can change in different phases of life, what might have been a priority 5 years ago may be further down the list now (for example, once I had children flexibility became extremely important to me in relation to work and looking after my kids, picking up from nursery/school and being around at the beginning and end of their day). You can also have different values for different areas of your life (career/personal etc), you will likely find some overlap but the priority order may not be the same.

Pick an area of life you want to enhance, improve or explore (e.g., work, education, health, leisure, parenting, friendship, spirituality, intimate relationship). Then consider which values best complete this sentence: In this area of my life, I want to be …

Click here for a list of common values.
If your values are not listed, I have left a couple of spaces at the bottom for you to add them.

In my 1-2-1 work, I usually dedicate an entire 60-minute session to deciphering values. Thee are lots of ways that I can help you to figure out your values and what means the most to you and then another session is around how these values can be brought into your present life or have some values-based goals (values motivate us, so if your goals align to your values – you’re already halfway there)!

Would love to hear if you’ve found this useful.

Love Chloe x